Just Bein' a Pastor

Now that all the hoopla of a seminary schedule combined with a pastor's schedule has relented, I took some time for vacation. It was nothing fancy, in fact my hubs and I stayed at home and did day trips. However I must say that it was very restful. No itinerary, no packing, and no extended travel to add stress to my time off. It was a wonderful transition into the next few weeks of just being the pastor.

I am always amazed at the process of adjustment that occurs on this journey. One goes from feeling overwhelmed by the responsibilities of pastoring, to juggling those same responsibilities along with a full school schedule...and when a semester ends it seems that the original situation of pastoring is not that overwhelming after all. Isn't that part of the theory of relativity??? Anyway for the next few weeks I will be visiting shut-ins and not so shut-ins. I will take time to map out lectionary readings, hymns and sermon titles and line up meetings in preparation for the fall charge conference season. Each year I get a little more organized.

I need to remember that all of life is process and not just about destinations. So with that I will head out to visit God's people, do some office work and enjoy the sights and sounds of summer. God's blessings and peace to you all.

"Free Time"

School's out for summer. The crushing schedule of reading and paper writing is, for a time, over. I can take a break as it were and just enjoy being a wife, a mother and grandmother, a pastor and a person in need of some focused self care. So in that vein I have begun a plan of regular exercise and healthy eating. This is saying alot since I am a person who lives on anything quick, easy and wrapped in cellophane during times of great deadline stress. But there is much more to this type of living than what one eats or how one engages in physical exercise. It is an opportunity to slow down.

One of the reasons that fast food is so popular in our society is that it is as it says, fast. Rush in and rush out, no prep, no time, instant gratification. It feeds the cycle of disconnect we promote with ourselves and others. Tasks become our Master and their accomplishment is the order of the day. But, the art of healthy eating defies all that. Healthy eating requires time, thought, planning, preparation and intentional consumption. Experts say that one of the reasons for overeating is the lack of focus on what we are putting in our mouths on a daily basis. Healthy eating changes that. For instance, it requires us to plan out our meals, to make lists and to take time to prepare our food. This allows us the opportunity to fully engage with our food. I know that sounds odd, but to engage with anything is to become aware of it's presence and purpose in life. Food is meant to nourish us, to sustain life, to meet our dietary requirements, and to afford us all we need to maintain health.

So too engaging with life causes us to focus on people, places, and ourselves to become aware of the presence and purpose of life. This is what I struggle with most. To become fully present, engaged with the people, places and even with myself at any given time in life. I am always on to the next thought, next task, problem, or solution. By living in this way I am not really living at all, I am simply existing.

The preparation of healthy food and the practice of exercise helps me to be and to stay engaged with the present moment. With the assembly of ingredients one at a time, to produce a meal or with the isolation of muscles, the rate of my heart and breathing to maintain an optimal range for health each moment requires my full attention.

These lessons can now be applied to other areas of my life. My relationships with others, my listening skills, my relationship with God and with all creation. Every moment a sacred gift not wasted but lived, breathed, experienced and fully engaged. May this be the rhythm of my life.

The Greatest Feeling in the World

What is the greatest feeling in the world? Some would say love, others happiness or peace. But, I would say the greatest feeling in the world is relief. This discovery came about one day while a friend and I were in route to the funeral of a fellow pastor's parent. I was feeling ill with a headache and grumblies in the tumblies. A quick stop at a store for Pepsi and crackers (my aunt's remedy) and I was soon feeling better, much better.

This quick recovery sparked a conversation between the two of us about a man my friend had once known. This person was being interviewed by mental health professionals as to his emotional state and was asked the question posed here today.
"What is the greatest feeling in the world?"
To which he answered, "relief."
My friend then asked him, "What did they say?"
"Nothing." he said, "they just locked me up."

I don't know what the details were surrounding his hospitalization but, I have to say that this person was more insightful than anyone was willing to give him credit. Think about this for a moment, isn't relief at the heart of those things I mentioned earlier? Love, happiness, peace? In fact, isn't relief at the heart of all emotional, physical, even spiritual well being?

When we experience love, are we not on some primal level relieved that someone loves us? If you have ever reached a critical place within a relationship that hints of loss and those problems are worked through, then you know the relief of reconciliation. When we experience happiness (whatever that may be) are we not relieved we aren't in pain? Even in the case of terminal illness, one can experience a form of relief when death is an end to that suffering. In fact many use the term, "they are at peace," when addressing the relief of death.

One of the definitions listed on Dictionary.com for the word relief is, "to free from an enclosed space," like to relieve pressure. I find it interesting that artistic carvings which produce raised images from a flat service are called reliefs. It seems to suggest that the image was somehow freed or liberated from the enclosed space of the medium, (wood or stone) through the act of carving or chiseling. Relief is liberation.

Yes, I do believe that young man held within his grasp the answer to one of life's deeper questions. It's answer can touch the silly to the sublime. It's a simple concept with a far reaching context and it is what I wish for those whom I hold close and for us all, the liberation of relief. Free from all that would bind or limit our full expression of life with our Creator. So, as you go about your daily life may you experience the freedom to be who you are created to be, may you experience relief.

The Home S-t-r-e-t-c-h

We here at seminary are nearing the home stretch, the last three weeks of classes and finals. All over campus one can sense the tension mounting as we rush to finish, (or begin) final papers, cobble together presentations, study for final exams and try our best to cram in the weekly reading for our last two classes. Ha! For those of us that also pastor a congregation or three, or four, or who work full time jobs in addition to school responsibilities the pressure can be deadly.

It is a continual balancing act between work, school, family and self-care. Too often self-care is sacrificed for the sake of the others. At some point, one must ask at what price do we sacrifice our own care?

If we as leaders in both church and community do not daily practice the care of self such as, healthy eating habits, (my personal down fall right along with the next one.) exercise, prayer time for our spiritual growth, and regular medical and dental care (financial luxuries for seminary students, I know); then what by our actions/examples are we teaching those we lead?

For many seminary students and pastors, the driving force behind much of what is done is the need to meet the expectations of others. The expectations of one's school responsibilities clearly laid out in each class syllabus and the expectations of our employers, churches and families which can, if we allow them, overtake our time and kill off our self-care. Long before Easum and Capshaw wrote the book, Put on Your Own Oxygen Mask First: Rediscovering Ministry, I used the same example for self-care. I understood that on a plane, if a parent did not apply the mask that would keep them alive first to themselves, they may pass out before being able to place the mask on their child. One can quickly see the importance of this lesson as an unconscious parent can help no one.

The same premise of self-care is important for the future and present leaders of the Church and the world. If we do not care for ourselves then how can we care for anyone or anything else?

Let's take care of ourselves! So, here's our homework, (Ow, bad word these next few weeks) take a chunk out of each day for you, it doesn't have to be hours and hours, but one hour or so each day to pray, or exercise or both. To walk in God's Creation, to breathe, to dance, to get a massage...my personal fav, drink tea with a friend, or anything you can think of that will breathe life into your tired and overworked soul. A mini retreat.


There will always be a Home Stretch in life, deadlines, responsibilities and expectations, my prayer, is for us to care for ourselves so that we then may as whole persons, care for that to which God calls us. God's blessings as you travel along life's journey.